August 2023

Menopausal Hotties

The hottest topic in town: Hottie’s Menopause Manual

The Emma Heaven magazine is proud to present the Hottie’s Menopause Manual..

Did you know that there are - brace yourselves - 34 reported symptoms associated with the menopausal journey?

Ohhh yes hotties you read that right! Not 3 to 4 but a goddamn 34 of the cheeky little blighters. You may want to make a cuppa or pour yourself a large glass, and sit comfortably as it’s a looooong list.

Do not fear though warrior hotties, as we are going to take them in our stride and steadily work our way through them.

Hopefully this will arm you with the knowledge, power and humour required in order to deal with the emotional and physical minefield that is the menopause.

We continue with…

19. Electric Shocks ~ aka Electric Shock Sensation (ESS)


This! 👆👆👆 fellow hotties does not refer to the sound of your Rice Krispies in the morning after being drenched with ice cold milk! You will be shocked and shaken to find that this actually relates to yet ANOTHER possible side effect of that glorious journey through menopause - electric shocks!

This is a pretty strange symptom that not even the scientists fully understand, however, we do know that plenty of women experience them, particularly as a precursor to a hot flush/flash!

It’s thought to be down to that fluctuating hormonal role of oestrogen again, which plays with our nervous system as it sends messages along the nerves to our brain causing a misfire. Signals can get crossed or amplified and distorted which cause the sensation of a tingle or a shock.

Other contributing factors include some medications, in particular, ones that are prescribed for hot flashes/flushes, may also contribute to and exacerbate these shocking sensations. Add in a little - or a lot of - anxiety and the likelihood is, that this will also ramp up the severity of ESS! 

Although it is a small comfort to know that ESS won’t harm you, it can disrupt sleep and increase anxiety - as if that isn’t already at the highest end of the ‘OMG Anxiety Red Alert Scale’ with everything else us hotties have to contend with!

If your ESS is particularly bad, giving you cause for concern, then this could be a symptom of a more serious condition, so ALWAYS seek advice from your GP/healthcare professionals.

Electric shock sensation (ESS) can feel like a rubber band being flicked or snapping against your body, or it can feel as though a zing of electricity is shooting through you. It has also been likened to a jolt from a taser but - in all seriousness - which of our fellow hotties is going to put their hands up and admit to being tasered? On second thoughts, let's not discuss potential kinks or any other strange or perturbing extracurricular pastimes… 

I mean, come on! Who are we to judge? Each to their own and all that! So moving swiftly on…

Now we’ve identified what these ESS ‘jolts from the blue’ are and what they feel like, how on earth can we deal with them!? It’s really NOT rocket science ladies - and pretty much how we deal with our other peri/menopause symptoms; the following common sense approach is best. You could even say they are ESSential…

  • Drink more water ~ when you are properly hydrated, it’s ‘all systems go’, therefore your body and all its functions perform much better.
  • Eat well, making sure you get all the nutrients your peri/menopausal body and mind requires. Make healthier choices, because we all know by now, if we fill our bodies with crap - aka ‘garbage in, garbage out’ - then we will reap what we sow and will feel like crap! Yet when we eat fresh, healthy foods, no prizes for guessing that we feel fresh and healthy too! 
  • Get off the sofa and move more! Ideally outside and as close to nature as you can! Exercise boosts your mood by reducing stress and anxiety, plus it helps you cope with the emotional side effects of peri/menopause. 
  • Cut down on the caffeine and alcohol. Nobody is saying you need to abstain, however, everything in moderation hotties. You buzzing from too much caffeine or passed out from way too much of the ‘giggle juice’ is not good for your health, wellbeing or reputation! And spare a thought for your nearest and dearest. Who wants to deal with a pi$$ed up, hormonally-awry, menopausal woman awash with a bucket load of symptoms which seemingly defy all logic and understanding?!
  • Get (re)acquainted with the Zzzzzz’s. Practise good sleep habits, because sleep deprivation or disturbed sleep affects our body and how it functions, thus exacerbating our peri/menopause symptoms. Plus - or should that be minus?!? - it makes us even more grouchy and unbearable to live with.
  • Consider supplements - these can make a huge difference to your menopause experience; however, a word of CAUTION: please make sure you do your due diligence and research them properly, including getting advice from your pharmacist or GP. 

Now we hope we haven’t shocked you too much with this latest revelation fellow hotties, but if you’re in need of a shock absorber, here's our electrifying playlist to get that body buzzing and all ‘up and at ‘em’ to shimmy those shocks away! 

Together in Electric Dreams - Phil Oakley and Giorgio Moroder
Electricity - Dua Lipa ft Diplo, Mark Ronson
Danger! High Voltage - Electric Six - if you want some extra shock value, check out their video! #NSFW
Electric Feel - MGMT
She’s Electric - Oasis
Electric Avenue - Eddy Grant
Are "Friends" Electric? - Tubeway Army
Electric Worry - Clutch
Electricity - Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark
Electric - Katy Perry

Hottie’s Menopause Manual

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Tags: Menopausal Hotties