Menopausal Hotties
The hottest topic in town: Hottie’s Menopause Manual
The Emma Heaven magazine is proud to present the Hottie’s Menopause Manual..
Did you know that there are - brace yourselves - 34 reported symptoms associated with the menopausal journey?
Ohhh yes hotties you read that right! Not 3 to 4 but a goddamn 34 of the cheeky little blighters. You may want to make a cuppa or pour yourself a large glass, and sit comfortably as it’s a looooong list.
Do not fear though warrior hotties, as we are going to take them in our stride and steadily work our way through them.
Hopefully this will arm you with the knowledge, power and humour required in order to deal with the emotional and physical minefield that is the menopause.
We continue with…
2: Hot Flushes
It’s time to focus on the second symptom on our list - it’s going to get a little steamy without a sauna in sight - as we get hot under the collar with Hot Flushes - or Flashes - depending which side of the pond you live. Anyhow, whichever way you say it, it’s sizzling hot and not necessarily in a good way! But don’t entirely abandon hope either…
Having hot flushes are probably one of *THE* most telltale signs of peri-menopause and menopause.
Imagine for a moment that you’re going about your daily business without a care in the world; perhaps having dinner with friends or family, out at the shopping centre, or simply sitting reading a good novel or catching up with your favourite TV show.
Feel perfectly comfortable, then, out of the blue, a wave of heat surges and floods through your body, bringing you out in beads of perspiration. Who the hell turned on the fire inside of you?
Ever blushed in your life, and felt your (facial) cheeks burn and tingle?! Well imagine that sensation - and then some - as your entire body seems to furiously ‘blush’ from the inside out, from head to toe!
Seriously, it’s like nothing you’ve ever experienced. You start stripping off any layers of clothes faster than Usain Bolt, frantically fanning yourself with whatever comes to hand, waving your hands around like you're shooing away swarms of bees. Go and stand in front of the open fridge or searching for water like you're in the desert and just spotted an oasis of utter chill and tranquility. Yep - it’s THAT intense and then some…
Then just as fast as it came, and as if like magic, ‘POOF!’ and it’s gone again, disappearing almost as quickly as it appeared. Bewildered, you’re left wondering what the heck just happened (or words to that effect). It can be so very unsettling and so intermittent, akin to a long lost relative turning up unannounced, dropping by to say hello once in a blue moon, or - more frequently - surging every few minutes. Crikey. What a ‘house guest’ to have eh?!?
So what is it that causes us hotties to have these Hot Flushes?
Our body's inner heat is governed and managed by our hormones. As we embark on our journey towards menopause our female hormones start to decrease. Even a little drop in oestrogen causes our inner thermostat - called the hypothalamus - to react; when it thinks the body is too warm it (helpfully!) triggers a chain of events to try and cool the body down known as a hot flush/flash.
So hotties, what can we do to help ourselves?
Well there are plenty of options:
- Hormone replacement therapy (HRT) could help to boost your dwindling hormones
- Natural remedies - such as clary sage, starflower (aka borage) oil and isoflavones - are reported to help manage symptoms
Cut back on caffeine, alcohol and spices (what?? How very dare you!!) - Wear natural fabrics
- Stay hydrated - pssst! Water really is a girl’s best friend!
- Mindfulness, guided meditations, and relaxation techniques as the menopause can adversely impact your mood
- Keep your environment nice and cool - and have your roomies invest in thermal underwear if they can’t stand the thermostat being on low!
These are just a few things for starters. Everyone’s journey is different and as unique as you.
Therefore, how you deal with ‘the change’ and all its eccentric ways is individual to you and you’ll need to decide what’s best for you, talk to an expert to guide you.
There is so much more awareness and coverage in the mainstream media, government debates and day to day life, compared to even a couple of years ago. And it’s heartening to see women gain the right to get the treatment they want/need.
The good news is that these flushes can be managed; they do pass, eventually becoming less frequent. Thank you Mother Nature, you’re too kind!
***DISCLAIMER However, just a little word of caution ~ if you are experiencing hot flushes, or any other symptoms giving you cause for concern, always check it out with your GP/health care professional to rule out any other potential cause***
Meanwhile hotties, stay cool and fabulous, and remember to invest in a fan, it’s a gal’s best friend. I’d marry mine if it were legal. You could say I’m my fan’s Number One Fan!!
Love
Julie x
Hottie’s Menopause Manual
27. Poor Sleep
When Forrest Gump claimed, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get”, he could have been describing menopause because as we all know ladies, menopause and its barmy symptoms is a complete conundrum - totally befuddling and one hell of a shit show as you try and navigate your journey into the unknown. You could even say it’s batshit crazy!
One size most definitely doesn’t fit all and everybody's journey is completely different. Your symptoms and experiences may be totally different to other women going through ‘the change’ which can be confusing, worrying, leaving you feeling all alone, but do not fear hotties as there is now so much information at your fingertips and help is on hand to help you navigate your way through this difficult time…so strap in ladies and deploy that sense of humour needed in order to learn about and get to grips with another menopause symptom - poor sleep.
We all need a good night’s sleep and it can be really frustrating when we find it difficult to produce those zzzz’s and to keep them going for the entire night. A massive 61% of women report troubles with insomnia during peri/menopause. This has a huge knock-on effect impacting daily life and exacerbating our anxiety.
Aching bodies, hot flushes - especially night sweats and mood changes - depression, in particular, are all prime suspects that contribute to poor sleep, so managing these issues will be key to helping manage sleep symptoms as well.
So how do we enter slumberland for an all inclusive stay?
- Avoid heavy meals before bed - maybe spicy vindaloos aren't the best of supper treats?!
- Minimize exposure to light before bed - give the all-night disco rave a miss!
- Avoid napping after 3 pm - or run the risk of joining the night owls.
- Don't exercise before bed - well maybe a little gentle sexercise to help you relax…
- Create a relaxing bedtime ritual - and if sexercise isn’t your thing, try some calming music (we’ve thoughtfully provided a soothing playlist below), a relaxing bath or maybe a massage - but be warned though, that could lead to some sexercise!
- Keep electronics out of the bedroom - that means putting down your bloody phone or iPad hotties and turning off that telly!
- There are many over-the-counter remedies and or even prescription medicines to help with sleep disturbances, but it is vital to seek advice from your GP or pharmacist. Because medications are only short-term remedies and not cures, it is essential you see a health professional before taking any medications.
And don’t forget the menopause drill:
P.S. There’s a reason Sleeping Beauty always looked so damn good and that’s because she slept a lot. It’s not bloody rocket science fellow hotties and it’s not called beauty sleep for fun either!
Believe it or not, beauty sleep is an actual ‘thing’ - we kid you not! It refers to how our skin and body begin to heal themselves from the day. When those tired heads hit the pillow and we enter the land of nod, our body enters recovery mode and produces growth hormones, which create new cells that help heal our skin from any damage done during the day.
Now you may be asking yourself if that were true why do I still wake up looking like a hot mess? Unfortunately ladies, beauty sleep is not a miracle cure and sometimes the only thing that will genuinely help you look more presentable in the morning is a hairbrush and makeup bag! Always keeping it real ladies - ALWAYS keeping it real!
Slumber Songs:
All of Me - John Legend
All Out of Love - Air Supply
Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me - George Michael & Elton John
Don’t Give Up - Peter Gabriel & Kate Bush
Eternal Flame - The Bangles
Everytime - Britney Spears
Flying Without Wings - Westlife
Gave It All Away - Boyzone
Give Me Back My Heart - Dollar
Holding On For You - Liberty X
I’m Not In Love - 10cc
If You’re Not The One - Daniel Bedingfield
Now We Are Free - Lisa Gerrard
Perfect Moment - Martine McCutcheon
The Power of Love - Frankie Goes To Hollywood
Say Something - A Great Big World & Christina Aguilera
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