October 2021

Emily Nicole Roberts

I’m from Swansea in South Wales, and I’m 23 years old. I think it’s important to note here - though you’ve probably already noticed from my photo - that I use a wheelchair in my everyday life.

emily nicole roberts

I’m from Swansea in South Wales, and I’m 23 years old. I think it’s important to note here - though you’ve probably already noticed from my photo - that I use a wheelchair in my everyday life.

My friends and family will read that and sigh “yeah, we know”...

This is because I have a condition called Cerebral Palsy (CP). Embarrassingly enough, I had to learn more about CP, because a stranger once asked more questions about it that I couldn’t actually answer... *bit awks like*.

Point being, yes, I am disabled; but growing up, I was just a little girl, who sat in a little wheelchair. To my parents, I was simply Emily Nicole, their daughter/diva hahaha!!

I remember my mum saying to me in my teens that “the world didn’t revolve around me”. And I was genuinely shocked and appalled!

My life has been plenty of things, but boring isn’t one of them…

I am loud, gobby, unapologetic, and POSITIVE and I’ll be sharing random thoughts, with my unique sense of humour and potty mouth on all magazine-related topics, every month. Reading is believing!

“I didn’t know Halloween was a year long”

Yeah, you know what that means...

Starbucks are foaming at the mouth and their coffee machines are waiting to throw out litres of Pumpkin Spiced Lattes to energise the starved Instagram feeds of 2021.

Meanwhile, I want an excuse to hide my hangover with a snood, I want to remember that orange doesn’t suit me in ANY shade, oh, and I want to ignore Halloween.

At. All. Costs.

Sorry to everyone reading this, but I can’t even pretend to be excited about Halloween. I dread it. Dreading it more than the hairdresser who’s tasked with dying your hair Platinum Blonde when it’s chestnut brown, all in one go.

I just don’t get the hype. Ghosts? We’ve all got enough of those in our conversations history.

Dressing up and going to parties? Minus the alcohol, that alllll stopped when I was 10.

Being scared on purpose? No thank you!! I’m in my mid twenties! living on my nerves happens when I don’t know which exit to take on a roundabout or when my payment is processing.... on a Sunday morning.

I don’t watch scary films, and yes, Jurassic Park and Pirates Of The Caribbean are obviously included in said category. I have never been on a rollercoaster alone, I can think of nothing worse than someone jumping out on me, I would probably - **definitely** - cry my eyes out.

Get the picture?

Now, this article isn’t meant to put a damp squib in your witches’ cauldron and turn the blood you’re curdling sour. Nah. In fact, I think I may throw out the rule book this year and celebrate Halloween after all. (Not to feed my ever growing ego and god complex) but I don’t think I’m a scaredy cat after all.

After the horror of 2020 I think I can stretch to answering my door to a few Scream masks. Who knows, I may EVEN chuck a film rated 18 on... Mute!
I’m not kidding anyone mun! I jump at my microwave beeping. No, I’m not joking.

Whichever you choose to enjoy the month of October and Halloween itself, go wild!! Note, there is a noticeable difference between wild and feral.

Although I’ll never love Halloween, partly, because I’ll never be able to pull off a ‘fit cat’ costume and partly because a Mr Blobby costume would genuinely terrify me. Still! That doesn’t mean I can’t appreciate it.

While everybody else gets spooky, I’ll just be getting comfy. Shutting my eyes, scrolling past each Insta post, and eating jelly tots opposed to jelly shots.
To my mates and everyone reading this... Have a good one, I’m saying it now because I’ll be asleep by 9!

Love Emily xx

For more inspiration and entertainment, you can follow me on my social media platforms.

Facebook: emilynicoleroberts
YouTube: emilynicoleroberts
Instagram: emilynicoleroberts
Twitter: emilynicolerobs

 

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