Just as a horoscope is a short prediction of future events based on the relative positions of the stars and planets at the time of a person’s birth - and we make no judgment if you do or don’t believe. Much...!
So with this in mind, we at emmaheaven.com have decided to consult with the Fashion gods (yes they do really exist) to see what fashion and beauty looks are essential for your star sign every month.
Failure to comply with your ‘fashionscope’ may result in us calling the fashion police to arrest you for a sense of humour failure and inability to take the mick out of yourself and your wardrobe!
Fashion and beauty should be fun - life’s way too short, so let’s get a grip and don’t take it - or ourselves - too seriously!
There used to be a powerful connection between you and your wardrobe, and now that lockdown is coming to an end, with ‘normal life’ resuming soon...it’s time to reconnect and rekindle that sartorial love affair. Oh how you and wardrobe were so in tune with each other. Upon opening the door each morning; it could sense your needs, and as if by magic, would pull your eyes in the right direction, always landing upon the perfect outfit for that particular day. Every occasion it would come up trumps; it’s now time to reacquaint yourself with your best and most trusted friend and start embracing the ENTIRE contents not just the loungewear and elasticated waistband section!
You’ve seen people in a different light during this pandemic, and boy have some of them totally let themselves go. Yes, you totally understand that there hasn’t been much call for glamorous dressing, however, that doesn’t mean you have to slob around in the same old uber-stretchy loungewear for days on end, accumulating various stains - aka ‘canteen medals’ - from food and wine spillages. You need to have a word with these people sweetie. Whisper some sweet words of encouragement, or maybe offer your fashionista services via FaceTime in the faint hope that they will no longer commit crimes against fashion and their dignity! #HaveSomePride
You are majorly rethinking your social calendar which has been thrown off track with the latest lockdown developments. Did someone say garden party?! Calm down and breathe sweetie. They’re not talking a full-on garden party Royal/celebrity style standards, but rather a more intimate little gathering of your nearest and dearest. So don’t dust off the bunting just yet! HOWEVER, this does mean you have outfits that need careful planning and there’s not a moment to lose. It’s time to create the perfect ‘garden party chic’ and NOT ‘gardeners’ workaday garb’...maybe gorging all those lockdown ‘treats’ wasn’t such a great idea, especially when you have to disguise your mushrooming jelly belly. Much as we love some dungarees, they’re not really what we had in mind for relaunching a post-lockdown social life! #LetOperationBellyBlitzCommence
Alarm bells are chiming with the countdown to freedom, and that wonderful experience of socialising, and dare we say it? dressing up and going out to party! The very thought of a summer of sipping cocktails with friends just chatting and passing the time of day is something we have dreamt of for months and months, with the added bonus we finally get to banish those pesky masks to the bottom of the draw. No more ‘mascne’ or smudged lipstick all over your face everytime you take them off! You’re under starters orders sweetie...let’s start the partying preparations. #LetsGetReadyToCocktail
Even though not much has happened in your own little world during the last few months, you still feel the need for some rest and reflection. As you return to that road to freedom you are questioning the return of quite a few activities, rituals and even people you used to socialise with. Lockdown has been quite the revelation - quite frankly you have been shocked by some people's actions and opinions, and are now questioning “do you want these people around you?”, and “do you want to return to a life of pointless dressing up and partying?” The people you can well do without. However, the end of lockdown beckons baby, so EVERYONE is required to dress up and party as if their life depends on it - it’s the new law sweetie! #LetsGetThisPartyStarted
Focus on (re)building bonds with your wardrobe. It’s been feeling mightily rejected, underused and unloved, so take some time out of your very (un)busy schedule, step away from the computer/tablet/phone TV screen, and pay it a visit. We guarantee you’ll discover some long lost treasures that you used to wear back in the day, when us humans socialised and partied and generally had fun! Well that time is coming, so dust down those lost treasures and rediscover your inner fashionista. It’s time to celebrate sweetie...you get to play dress up once more. Now all you need to do is make sure everything still fits! #LockdownOvereatingDilemma
No pain...no gain Virgo! Or loss for that matter! You got yourself into this unhealthy, unkempt mess, and now you have a few months to get out of it before the big release back into the wilds. You’ve spent months cultivating body hair in places you never knew it could grow, and, thankfully you will soon be able to go and have every last tuft waxed, threaded, plucked and even indulged with some lasering! The point is, you will no longer resemble Bigfoot’s long lost relative, nor will you have to plait it to keep it under control; and neither will you have to wear wafty, tent-like, kaftan clothing with the ability of maximum coverage! #PleasePracticeSelfCare
You are finding it hard to concentrate as all the rules are changing - AGAIN. The only thing you need to be concerned with is your appearance! The following question needs to be answered honestly. Do you currently look A: The same as I did before lockdown? B. Worse than I did before lockdown? C: Better than I did before lockdown? If it is C, then congratulations sweetie. Now take your smugness elsewhere and celebrate, leaving us mere mortals to contemplate. If it’s A, you’re a born survivor; toast your success because your wardrobe still fits and people will still recognise you. If you answered B, it’s time to press the nuclear button; exercise, diet and don’t forget the all important grooming - nobody likes a slob, even if that has become the default lockdown setting! #ItsMetamorphosisTime
There’s no place like home and boy oh boy has it been your safe haven. However, it’s time to start dressing up and venturing outside - and NO, that does NOT include nipping to the supermarket, wearing the same lounge suit you’ve been stuck in and stuck to the sofa with, for the past week. Have some dignity sweetie. Ditch the comfies and get back to the land of the living. You know the place? That’s right, it’s the one where people dress up, or just simply ‘dress’, and embrace fashion. Plus they make sure their appearance is in pristine condition. A little normality is soon to resume, so make sure you’re ready for it. #YourHermitDaysAreOver
Two heads are better than one, especially when checking out an outfit. That extra pair of eyes can give a full appraisal of your appearance from the rear as we all know sometimes a mirror isn’t always a girl’s best friend - in fact, they’re more like the fun house ones found at the circus, distorting things to EPIC proportions. Just make sure it’s an honest person doing the appraising as the last thing you want is for them to tell you that your chosen outfit doesn’t make your bum look big when really it’s casting more shade than a Real Housewife in full flight! Nobody wants an unflattering and badly showcased derriere. #HonestyIsTheBestPolicy
You have abandoned your financial goals. Everything was going so well with the money saving. Your bank account looked healthy, well it did until Boris revealed his leaving lockdown roadmap. All hell was let loose, along with your wallet. It’s been a mad few weeks and you have shopped like a true fashionista. Even your iPad was relieved when you finally put it down to recharge. It was completely drained and now, so are you; so it’s time for a little rest and relaxation while you wait for your deliveries and peruse your bounty of goodies with a well earned glass of fiz. Now all you need to do is speed up time so you can unleash your fabulousness on the world once more! #MyWardrobeIsMyWealth
People flaunting their (supposedly) perfect lives and bodies online has really got on your wick! There you are, day after day, sitting on the sofa feeling rather unattractive with your roots that badly need re-doing, skin that’s spotty, and the spare (tractor) tyre around your midriff, artfully tucked into yet another pair of yoga pants with an elasticated waist, with no yoga mat to be seen for miles around! Scrolling through various social media feeds has left you with a touch of the green-eyed monster at all the fabulously dressed, so-called ‘beautiful people’, #LovingLife. Reality check here sweetie - they probably got all dressed up for the photo, spent the last few hours adding endless filters, before sitting back down on the sofa to veg out. Just. Like. You! #SocialMediaIsntReal