Just as a horoscope is a short prediction of future events based on the relative positions of the stars and planets at the time of a person’s birth - and we make no judgment if you do or don’t believe. Much...!
So with this in mind, we at emmaheaven.com have decided to consult with the Fashion gods (yes they do really exist) to see what fashion and beauty looks are essential for your star sign every month.
Failure to comply with your ‘fashionscope’ may result in us calling the fashion police to arrest you for a sense of humour failure and inability to take the mick out of yourself and your wardrobe!
Fashion and beauty should be fun - life’s way too short, so let’s get a grip and don’t take it - or ourselves - too seriously!
Changeable weather overload!!! What the bloody hell is the British weather doing lately? Talk about raining on your parade. It is taking every last ounce of your self control not to throw a giant hissy fit EVERY time it rains and spoils yet another fabulous outfit choice, resulting in hastily cobbled together last minute changes, which totally spoil the look you were going for. Alas fellow fashionista, this is a cross we have to bear, so we strongly suggest you have a vast selection - aka contingency plan - of items which make fashionable and clever cover ups, that look as though they were part of your original ensemble. #TooCleverForMyOwnBoots
Your fashionista senses are picking up on some negative vibes and shades of the green-eyed monster from friends, or should that be ‘frenemies’? Look sweetie, there is only one way to deal with this and that is to rise above the bullsh*t and ignore them. Wear what you want, when you want, and don’t give a flying fashion f**k what anybody says. If they shoot nasty or sneering looks, flash those pearly whites and repay them with a retina-detaching dazzle of your megawatt smile. Kill them with kindness - hopefully they’ll go away, taking their negativity and nastiness with them! #IRefuseToEntertainNegativity
You are fully in charge of your wardrobe and expect some respect and admiration for how you run this all important element of your daily life. It takes time, effort and dedication to looking this good and don’t let anyone forget it! The hours of work put in trawling the internet for fabulous, unique items is not to be underrated, neither are the miles you put in, prowling your local boutiques and shopping centres in search of that elusive item to rock your fashion world, leaving you feel giddy and breathless; it’s as if you have found the holy grail - in your fashionista eyes you most certainly have sweetie. Bravo sweetie! Bravo! #FashionIsMyLife
Don’t spend days on end analyzing your wardrobe or you will never get the chance to actually wear what hangs within. Yes, sure you can admire your collection of wonderful fashionable, vintage and staple pieces that you have lovingly bought, collected and curated over the years, meaning that you can plan a whole array of outfits for EVERY occasion imaginable. HOWEVER, if you have nowhere to go sweetie, then nobody is actually going to see them, therefore you get no glory! So for the love of Prada, start filling your social diary with events so us mere mortals can finally feast our eyes on your brilliant fashionista skills. #NoAudienceNoPraiseNoGlory
You need a little R&R after weeks of socialising, almost single-handedly propping up the hospitality sector and doing your bit for the economy. You’re all cocktailed out and long for the comfort of a lounge suit, your comfy sofa, Netflix, and a lovely cuppa. Sometimes it’s the simplest of pleasures that are needed sweetie; and although you love to get dressed up in your finest and sashay the night away, you also NEED, nay CRAVE your creature comforts. So don’t feel guilty about resurrecting your lounge suits from their sartorial Siberia. Take comfort from them with their wonderful elasticated waists and enjoy some (temporary) vegging-out time. #WorkRestAndPlay
Something is weighing heavily on your mind. You know you need to save your pennies for a rainy day. On one shoulder sits a fashion angel telling you that you have more than enough fabulous outfits and there is no need to splurge on any more; yet on your other shoulder is the fashion devil par excellence, enticing you to part with your hard earned cash, cajoling you into buying ‘stuff’ you don’t want or need! Be strong duckie and resist, because however fabulous your wardrobe may be, if you ain’t got no money to go socialise and party your socks off, then nobody's going to see those wonderful outfits anyway! #YouCantHaveYourDressAndWearIt
Doing the right thing can and will earn you lots of Brownie points, and maybe even bestow some good karma. Plus, helping out a fashion-clueless friend in their hour of need will also make you feel good and oh so clever, knowledgeable and utterly fashionista-fabulous! So if someone sends out that fashion SOS distress flare, we suggest you rise to the challenge sweetie and save that damsel in distress. Word of your good deed will spread fast, not only making you popular and desirable company, but it could possibly prove to be quite lucrative if you want to start a whole new sideline business as a fashion stylist!
Leave your ego at the door sweetie. EVERYONE knows you always look amazing and no matter what you wear, you always stand out from the crowd, blah, blah, blah! However, nobody likes a showoff and you don’t need to rub people’s noses in it. Being humble is not a weakness; in fact, it has quite the opposite effect and may even make you far more likeable and, dare we say it? Human?! People will only aspire to be like you if it’s actually attainable. So continue to be fashion-fabulous, but also be charming, friendly and approachable, then step back and watch your following go through the roof. #ItsTimeToMeltTheIceQueen
You have been planning an outfit for that special occasion for what seems like an eternity. After scrolling through Instagram for hours on end, you finally stumble on what has the potential to be a WOW outfit, even though the model is 6ft tall, with legs up to her armpits! You instantly ‘add to cart’ feeling pretty secure - and more than a tad smug - that you have nailed it! However, a note of caution: the vision you see on the screen and in your head might not actually transpire when you get to face the mirror in your latest acquisition! It could have the potential to shock the sh*t out of you, completely rocking your world, but NOT in a good way. Sometimes sweetie, it really is best to be realistic and honest with yourself. #ShopTheInternetWithCaution
Being subtle is most definitely NOT in your repertoire. Nothing sends a shiver up your spine faster than the thought of you blending into a crowd that’s drowning in a sea of beige and neutral colours. Perish the thought! You are a magnificent proud peacock, with dazzling colours and a sight to behold. Don’t ever change duckie - the world would be a lot duller and a far more boring place to live if people like you lost your nerve, sense of style and sense of humour. Fashion needs to be fun, creative and an expression of your multi-faceted personality; so go mad with the colour palette and paint your wardrobe with the rainbow! #ColourExplosionRequired
There are certain people who trigger you - the ones who pretend that fashion is *yawn, such a bore*, yet are the exact same ones who never comment on or compliment your amazing outfit choices, only to turn up to work a week later wearing the same bloody thing, or a knock off version! Rise above it sweetie, rise above it. They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, so just smile and congratulate yourself, because you clearly have what it takes in the fashion stakes. Now THAT my dear is cause for celebration - so for that alone, we highly recommend you toast yourself with an extra large glass of fizz! #AllHailTheFashionQueen
Don’t even bother walking on eggshells. If someone doesn’t like your outfit...well then, it’s tough titty! You don’t have to ask for anyone’s permission to wear whatever you want - it’s a basic fashion and human right! And as for dress codes...well, they are open to interpretation, non?! There’s always some wriggle room and a way to flex those rules. Get creative sweetie, open and expand that cunning creative mind of yours! Explore ALL the options, and if you’ve exhausted all possibilities and still cannot find a way around the rules, then don’t bloody attend! #IWontCompromiseOnFashion