Just as a horoscope is a short prediction of future events based on the relative positions of the stars and planets at the time of a person’s birth - and we make no judgment if you do or don’t believe. Much...!
So with this in mind, we at emmaheaven.com have decided to consult with the Fashion gods (yes they do really exist) to see what fashion and beauty looks are essential for your star sign every month.
Failure to comply with your ‘fashionscope’ may result in us calling the fashion police to arrest you for a sense of humour failure and inability to take the mick out of yourself and your wardrobe!
Fashion and beauty should be fun - life’s way too short, so let’s get a grip and don’t take it - or ourselves - too seriously!
Fight for what you believe in! If you’re not ready to sacrifice your skinny jeans, then stand up for them sweetie. In the grand scheme of things, does it really matter what the so-called fashion experts think; AND for that matter, who the hell are they to tell people what is and isn’t fashionable? AND, even more importantly, what if ‘mum jeans’ don’t suit you, or you’re not a big fan of your derriere spilling out of distressed denim, supposedly all in the name of fashion. Well it’s a load of codswallop and we strongly suggest you rebel! It’s time to flip the bird to the fashion experts, and start listening to the person who knows your shape and your tastes the best - YOU! Throw yourself a party, raise a glass or two, or several (no judgement here, after all it is a party!) and worship at the altar of skinny jeans...#SkinnyJeansForever
Trouble in your wardrobe? That’s serious stuff sweetie! That to us is trouble in paradise. Our wardrobe is our sanctuary; our ‘safe, happy place’, and if trouble is brewing, then it needs to be stopped in its tracks pronto! You may be having an identity crisis - so many clothes but nothing to wear - well nothing you think is appropriate or ‘right’ for the occasion. You may be having an epic toddler tantrum as nothing will fit you - no sympathy here sweetie if that’s self inflicted, and only you can do something about that! Start off with some yoga or meditation to calm yourself and to help you think rationally. Steer clear of alcohol - ‘medicinal’ or otherwise - that’s just extra calories you can ill afford; so let’s be sensible and go ‘back to basics’! Coincidentally, this ‘back to basics’ mantra applies equally well to resolving your wardrobe dilemma! #WinWin. Fashion genius as well as fashion gods! #NobodySaidItWasEasy
Finally, we can welcome you to the new year. After a whole month of sulking, mainly thanks to mislaying the ‘pause button’, and continuing to consume your bodyweight in festive treats and more, you have managed to slowly but surely, crawl out of your self-inflicted pit of pity and denial. Hoorah, you have recognised that the ONLY culprit behind the increasing inches was YOU! Now that you are ready to face 2020, albeit, concealed by the comfort of some ‘floaty tops’, it’s time to ‘put on your big girl pants’ (and to be frank sweetie, I think we all have a few pairs of those lurking in the knicker drawer), and take responsibility for extending the season of excess by several weeks. Step away from the cheese board, biscuit barrel and booze, it’s time to embrace the new year afresh and reunite yourself with the healthier you. One who isn’t compelled to raid the fridge everytime you pass the kitchen, and drawn to the fridge light, like a moth to a flame... STOP hunting down the latest calorific foodie fad, maybe refocus your energies, and try hunting down some new fashion looks instead - your (non-elasticated) waistband will thank you for it! #ExpandYourWardrobeNotYourWaist
Ready for a major breakthrough? It’s time to discover your inner goddess and unleash it on the world. It’s time to change people’s (and your own) perception of you! From boring sweater-wearing, middle of the road ‘little Miss Ordinary’ to, ‘get a load of what I’m wearing’ and how fabulous am I?! Nobody wants to get stuck in a rut, wearing the same old uniform, doing the same stuff with the same people, day after day, month after month. It’s like being on the world’s most tedious hamster wheel with no escape other than to jump for your life with reckless abandon. Pick yourself up, take in your new surroundings and embrace the new life you are about to begin. Be the star of your own show sweetie. Look fabulous, feel fabulous...be fabulous. Because you are! #IWantToBreakFree
It’s time to share your fashion ‘expertise’ (or should we say enthusiasm?) with the world. We cannot guarantee that the world is ready for you, but in the grand scheme of things, do you really care? You have a passion for fashion that radiates from you, and sometimes your fashion sense can be a hit or miss affair, with more misses than hits, but hey, who’s counting? You bring a feeling of fun, and fashion should be fun. Far too many take fashion waaaayyy too seriously, when in fact the world won’t stop turning because you’ve decided to wear canary yellow dungarees, nor will the FTSE100 collapse when you venture out in holographic buffalo platform shoes. So enjoy yourself, and feel free to indulge your fashion desires, secure in the knowledge that you are not the only peacock on the planet with an ‘eclectic’ dress sense. #DressToImpressYourself
Let the hibernation continue. You’re a long way away from summertime and contemplating exposing a tad more ‘flesh’, so that gives you a little breathing space sweetie to reverse the effects of the festive/new year aftermath in the privacy and comfort of your own home. There’s no stigma in being unsociable (or ‘selectively social’ as one of #TeamHeaven describes herself) - it’s still the season to indulge in Netflix and Britbox whilst sitting in your comfiest clothes and nobody will judge you for it, as they’re all busy doing the same! Just a few words of caution tho’ to tide you over: whilst being held captive by the small screen, be vigilant and do NOT engage in mindless eating or drinking, otherwise your winter hibernation will be swiftly followed by an extreme summer retreat, away from prying eyes, while you do your damndest to undo some of the damage sustained, when all you needed was a teeny tiny bit of sustained self-control. By all means binge - but on the boxsets, not the chocolates!! Slow and steady wins the race...#NetflixMarathonsDontPassForExercise
Your fashion power is running high this month. You could say that you’re on fire with your strategic fashion choices, which quite frankly sweetie, are magnificent! Whatever the elements throw at you, you always manage to be dressed for the occasion, in spectacular style! Rain, hail, snow, high winds - there ain’t nothing you’re not totally prepared to be accosted by! We salute you darling for upholding the fashionista status through thick and thin, through calm and storm. Enjoy the month ahead, toasting your success and sartorial superiority with copious amounts of delicate bubbles. You are fashion royalty - the Queen of Preen - long may you reign; and may you never fall by the wayside, ending up a dishevelled mess, lamenting your former brilliant style and savvy. #TreatYourselfLikeRoyalty
You may get overwhelmed by the sheer amount of last minute sales deals pouring into your inbox, taking up precious time and which are like catnip to a shopaholic fashionista like yourself; loathed as we are to state the obvious, but we are more than halfway through winter, and you won’t actually get that much wear out of any new wintry acquisitions. We know that old chestnut, that you can put them away for the next wintry season, but really sweetie, without sounding too pessimistic or being a ‘Debbie downer’, you could get run over by a bus!!! Soooo...save those pennies for your imminent summer wardrobe. Time for an inbox detox - simply delete EVERY time a special offer email rears its ugly head, and concentrate on searching for your dream holiday wardrobe. #GoodbyeWinterHelloSummer
Why are you being so rebellious? You know that resistance is futile, and eventually you will come around to the painful fact that trainers are now being worn by people who have never seen the inside of a gym, have ZERO intention of running a marathon, and much less a parkrun!!! They can look good when worn with certain outfits. Just make sure you do your research thoroughly, so if or when you do succumb, you end up looking chic a la Victoria Beckham and not chavtastic, a la Vicky Pollard from Little Britain. Keep moving with the times sweetie otherwise you’ll get left behind in the fashion stakes and no self-respecting fashionista wants **THAT**!! #StayRelevant
Who’s on your team this month? The fitness freaks? The fashionistas? The party people? The foodies? Or the outdoors people? Quite frankly, it all depends on your mood sweetie. If you’re not feeling your best after your latest attempt to shift a few stubborn pounds has been in vain, then you won’t want to have any of the fashionista squad in the vicinity of you and the slightly snug contents of your wardrobe. This could also impact upon the party people and foodie types you know, as it’s likely you and your willpower will crumble! Possibly the fitness group, so long as they’re not too hard core - you only want to drop a little weight, not drop out through heart failure and exhaustion! That just leaves the outdoor people, which has possibilities. Perhaps rambling, some gentle hiking, yoga on the beach - it’s all the rage you know and it will make you very bendy!!! #ChooseWisely
Considering big changes? Don’t be quite so quick off the mark sweetie. Proceed with caution, especially when considering an image overhaul. Just because you saw a young girl rocking lilac hair, doesn’t mean it’s going to look good on you! It takes a lot of confidence to pull off this kind of look with aplomb, not to mention you will need hair like steel to endure the mass of chemicals needed to turn your hair lilac, making it fall out or break off while you brush your once lustrous locks. Take small baby steps and perhaps consider trying different colour makeup. Ease yourself in gently and figure out what suits you before taking drastic action, leaving you with bad hair; or worse, NONE! #DontBeRashOrBrash
Two is the magic number this month and we’re not talking couples, Valentine’s Day and all that schizzle. We’re talking about the greatest love of fashionistas everywhere - shoes, lots and lots and lots of pairs of them! It’s time to indulge a little and get those tootsies some new footwear to prance around in. Those feet were made for walking, dancing and running, so with that mantra in mind, they’ll need lots of different footwear for each and every activity they will encounter. It’s not like us gals need any encouragement in the shoe shopping department, but now and again it’s OK to indulge a little more than usual; and if you shop wisely, especially as the sales continue, then it’s more than possible to bag a few bargains to keep your precious feet in the style and comfort to which they have become accustomed. Feed your inner centipede!! #ShoesCompleteMe