The hottest topic in town
WANTED!!!
Help! Has anyone seen the hot, calm, sane young woman I used to be, and not this overheated, irrational hot mess and semi-hysterical banshee I’ve become!?!
We can ‘want’ as much as we like, but, in the words of the Rolling Stones: ‘you can’t always get what you want’, no matter how hard you wish for it, or scream and rail at the unfairness of it all. That’s life; however, it is actually the natural journey we women unwillingly embark upon. And yes. It f*cking sucks but there we have it…It is what it f*cking is!! If you’re lucky enough to reach a certain age, women go through menopause.
Some take on this journey with dignity, whereas others are dragged through it kicking and screaming!!
Some lucky f*ckers breeze right through, meanwhile some unlucky beggars have to brave the $hitshow.
It’s like being given a tombola ticket and having no friggin’ idea what prize you’re gonna get!.
Which of the fabulous smorgasbord of symptoms will you get?
How bad will you get them?
And when will they ever f*cking end?!
The extremely rare ‘jackpot’ prize is the “Oh, I didn’t even realise I was going through menopause – I had no symptoms, and my periods just stopped almost overnight!”
You fortunate winners are such lucky, lucky barstuds!
Next up, we have the lesser prizes, where you experience fewer symptoms, which, although they can be a pain in the backside, are just about bearable!
Then there are the $hit prizes, rearing their fugly heads, where you’re hit with a multitude of symptoms which seriously impact your quality life and really f*cking get you down, BIG time!
And finally, bringing up the rear, are the booby prizes – bestowed upon the unfortunate souls who receive the whole bloody kit and caboodle; it’s a complete mind, body and head f*ck, such are the debilitating effects which impact on your daily life.
The only advice we can give at this stage, is to stop wanting the old you; get ready to accept and embrace the new you, ready for when you emerge on the other side – definitely older; hopefully a bit wiser; maybe not too battered or bruised; and braced to take on this next new chapter of your life.
It’s time to give zero f*cks about what people think of you, and in the grand scheme of things, do you really care?
Life is too short to waste time on stuff you cannot control, so embrace your new life and the woman you’ve become.
It’s not called the change for nothing you know! It’s the start of a new beginning.
So let’s change that aforementioned ‘wanted woman’ for a kick ass woman who has gone through a lot, yet survived to tell the tale and embrace her future.
…
WANTED:
A woman who is ready to:
- embrace a new start and grab life by the balls
- try new things, begin new adventures and have fun
- just be herself and be comfortable with who she is
- eat well, drink well, dress well, exercise well, work well, party well, holiday well, and just bloody well live well by being the best version of herself that she can be!!!
