Menopausal Hotties - Irritability

The hottest topic in town: Hottie’s Menopause Manual

The Emma Heaven magazine is proud to present the Hottie’s Menopause Manual..

Did you know that there are - brace yourselves - 34 reported symptoms associated with the menopausal journey?

Ohhh yes hotties you read that right! Not 3 to 4 but a goddamn 34 of the cheeky little blighters. You may want to make a cuppa or pour yourself a large glass, and sit comfortably as it’s a looooong list.

Do not fear though warrior hotties, as we are going to take them in our stride and steadily work our way through them.

Hopefully this will arm you with the knowledge, power and humour required in order to deal with the emotional and physical minefield that is the menopause.

We continue with…

32. Irritability

When your nearest and dearest accuse you of spending far too much time in the company of the following people:

Oscar the Grouch (Sesame Street)
Dr Gregory House (House)
Statler & Waldorf (The Muppets)
Al Bundy (Married With Children)
Ben Harper (My Family)
Victor Meldrew (One Foot in the Grave)

…is it time to admit that you have turned into a right irritable f*cker?!

Or are you just suffering from yet another precious gift bestowed upon you by Mother Nature, as you navigate that exhausting, mind-boggling journey called the peri/menopause?

Right then ladies…please be upstanding for symptom number 32: Irritability.

Now we all feel a bit antsy or fretful from time to time, however, if you're experiencing these feelings a bit more frequently than usual, so much so that family, friends and colleagues feel the need to point it out to you with the snide, sarcastic comments, then fellow Hotties, you are well within your rights to inform them to back the f*ck off, mind their own business and keep their unhelpful and unwanted opinions to themselves.

You are a woman, quite literally on the edge and close to the tipping point! So if they want to see the monster reveal itself, then leave them to crack on and deal with its all-consuming wrath. They will learn the hard way that they do not antagonise the monster or unleash the beast.

As with all of the other psychological and emotional changes, this is down to imbalances of those good ol’ trouble-making hormones, oestrogen and progesterone, wreaking havoc on us.

It might also be a result of being hangry. When our blood sugar levels drop too low, our bodies raise them back up by releasing cortisol, which in turn, makes us feel irritable.

Ways to tackle and manage this, without resorting to violence and maiming your nearest and dearest who dare to judge are:

However, as with anything related to our bodies and our health, if you are experiencing difficulties, it makes sense to seek advice from your GP or health professional to see if there are any underlying causes, medications or other treatments that may explain or help your symptoms.

And as always we love a little jiggle and giggle to a thumping good playlist, which helps to stop us getting so bloody damn irritated!!!

Here’s one we prepared earlier:

Three Little Birds - Bob Marley and the Wailers
Lose Yourself - Eminem
Happy - Pharrell Williams
MMMbop - Hanson
Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go - Wham
Walking On Sunshine - Katrina & the Waves
Xanadu - Olivia Newton-John
Beautiful Day - U2
Crazy - Gnarls Barkley
I Believe In A Thing Called Love - The Darkness
Dancing Queen - ABBA
Reach - S Club 7
I’m In The Mood For Dancing - The Nolans
Spice Up Your Life - Spice Girls
What A Wonderful World - Louis Armstrong