Debbie Buss - Who’s in charge of happiness?
Is life passing you by?
Hello I'm Debbie Buss. I am an Intuitive Healer and Spiritual Coach. My passion is working with women, helping them to get back into their forgotten bodies.
*Warning: This column contains strong language and adult content!
Who’s in charge of happiness?
For some of us, we often give things to other people and try to add to their happiness out of guilt.
We try to ease our guilt by giving and giving in the form of sacrificing ourselves.
Giving to others this way we can resent giving, and that form of giving doesn’t add to our happiness. What it really does is detract from it. You cannot be happy and give anything to someone else that you don’t honestly want to give.
“Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony.” Mahatma Gandhi.
The choice to add to others’ happiness will not make us happy unless we expect:
- no attention
- no acknowledgment,
- no reward for doing it
How often have you stood in an elevator or at a bus stop and no one says hello? We hide our problems from each other, becoming convinced that we are the only ones to feel this way.
But what if I said to you that our problems are showing us something, if we dare to look? We live in hope that someone else will show us love and add to our happiness one day.
Random acts of kindness can be as simple as saying “hello” to a stranger as you pass, or holding open the door for someone.
Daily acts of kindness do not need to add stress to your life and doing them should not make you feel as if you are sacrificing yourself.
- Pick up litter
- Donate things from your house to charities
- Giving someone a genuine compliment, instead of keeping the appreciative thought to yourself
- Volunteer to walk and play with the animals at an animal sanctuary
- Cook a meal for someone
- Smile and start a conversation with someone at your work whom you wouldn’t normally speak to
- Help someone carry a heavy load
- Visit an elderly neighbour
The very experience of giving and being generous with your time, heart, money, assistance, kindness and care will provide more value than you can imagine; especially when you release ‘attachment to the outcome’; you will be surprised how the good fortune you have shown to others will come back to you tenfold.
We live in a universal world of attraction or what I like to call the universal law of mirrors. Every kind gesture made to a stranger sends the sign that you trust in the generosity of the world.
Sometimes you fear whether you will get what you need, so you worry about money or love, and you start to withhold and hoard.
This can actually have the opposite effect (as I mentioned we live in a world of mirrors), by holding on and not trusting in the abundance of the universe you will see little return and you will begin to notice what isn’t there!
Don’t wait to get what you want. Give it away to others. Clear out the clutter. Make room for the new, and you will be amazed at how things turn around.
Sometimes it is not about what you are going to do with your life; it is about who you are going to be. It is the goodness in your heart that will help change the world.
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