Is life passing you by?
Hello I'm Debbie Buss. I am an Intuitive Healer and Spiritual Coach. My passion is working with women, helping them to get back into their forgotten bodies.
I am very excited to join #TeamHeaven. In this month’s issue I talk:
Raising your standards; and
The art of saying no.
*Warning: This column contains strong language and adult content!
Bring me back to life …………………….
At the beginning of writing this column I had writer’s block, I had so much I wanted to say but couldn't download it onto paper; it was starting to frustrate the hell out of me, so I took myself off on holiday, and thought that this would create the magic!
Just the feeling of the sun on my skin, the gentle breeze and the wonderful smell of lemons, olives, Jasmine and honeysuckle trees wafting around me, had the desired effect - it brought me back to life, where I belonged - and I loved every moment of it. So much so that when a family of five turned up ‘interrupting’ this slice of personal paradise, it really pissed me off! It was a huge jolt to my reality and timely reminder of how the simple things in life turn out to be the greatest.
I asked myself the question: “Why am I so triggered? Why did it get to me so much?” They were a family on holiday minding their own business, but it did; I became really annoyed with their presence, and then it hit me. I had finally found my equilibrium, my ‘safe little haven away from everything and everyone’. I had given my power away too freely back home; allowed people to take advantage of me; I allowed them to overstep my boundaries; and this was so apparent to me just by being somewhere different away from *that* ‘noise’.
As women, we can sometimes let fear, family commitments or work stop us from progressing our true calling. If we stop and just listen, we always had it within us.
But the business of life causes the mind to become noisy; and to eliminate this noise we often add more noise to it; so we become accustomed to the craziness of doing. Instead, if we just stop for one second, allow ourselves to breathe and be quiet, this is where we will find our calling.
You cannot adjust your behaviour if you aren't first aware of what that behaviour is, by focusing on why we are feeling this way. What is triggering that emotion in the first place? Only then can you start to really be in the present moment of your life.
We often hide our feelings so deeply that the mask we wear - and I wore that mask well - becomes a daily occurrence, until something triggers. That’s where the anger, frustration, the hurt begins to reveal its head which we often put down to stress or hormones.
It's not until we come full circle do we get to realise that we had the power all along within us, to live the life we were meant to, and to rise up and step out of our comfort zones.
When was the last time you truly felt alive? Those desires deep within you, the inner passions starting to come into the light, how they made you feel?
Sometimes all it takes is just that one tiny shift in your daily routine to make a difference which will soon become a domino effect that will ripple bigger changes, that will lead you to come full circle. RAISE YOUR STANDARDS…own who you are…accept who you are, give yourself fucking permission to be you, and start living your beautiful authentic self.
What is the false story you are telling yourself? What mask are you hiding behind?
Devote to what makes you feel good, embrace the fear - ask her to ”show me what you’ve got”? The truth will set you free. When we try to be someone we are not we become out of alignment. You may find that your body will start to tell you, aches, pains, it will show up in your skin, monthly periods will become erratic and out of sync. Anxiety, depression.
Start to feel those emotions. Anxiety is an emotion - it is not a disorder or a disease. The purpose of anxiety is to keep us safe and out of harm; it's our body's natural alarm system to trigger the ‘fight or flight’ response; and anxiety can actually help us to propel forward in our pursuits, stretch ourselves, and reach our full potential. Anxiety works so well that sometimes it can go into overdrive and causes our natural fight or flight response into believing there is danger when in fact there is none. This is when anxiety becomes detrimental to our health and wellbeing.
Have some healthy boundaries in place and do not settle for less than the best. You deserve respect and understanding. Do not allow others to walk over you. Say NO to people’s selfish demands, if they make you feel inferior or powerless. DO NOT GIVE YOUR POWER AWAY!
Shine bright like a diamond. Raising your standards does not mean to fight back…It means to speak your truth, without taking on the victim or martyr mentality, walk away. Watch how others react to you, look at who you spend time with, get really honest with yourself, call this crap out, not everyone is living in their truth…
In the words of the beautiful Sia who wore her wig well…To be human is to love, even when it gets too much. I’m not ready to give up. Are you?
Until next time…Shine your light bright.
Tags: Debbie Buss